Laura Wright 
This is an area which desperately needs attention today. While the field of paranormal investigation is far more popular than ever, there are generally some rules which proper groups follow (and all really should). I’m listing the ones I’ve came across first, but will post the general regulations from another site below. I will provide a link should you wish to review the guidelines on their web page:
- Remains calm and collected during an investigation. Displays of emotion are natural, theatrics are not.
- While checking for EVPs, the members of the investigation team need to remain quiet. Otherwise, what’s the point?
- Professional investigators do not use scare tactics or fear-mongering to achieve a goal.
- If any fee is charged, it should be clear and upfront.
- Beware any individuals who promise to “make you a paranormal investigator,” in “one weekend,” for only a few hundred bucks. There’s no such professional training.
- There is currently a strong argument against the use of Ouija Boards (or Spirit Boards). Paranormal investigators are supposed to be professionals and the use of a game board does not send a professional message. Both the Ouija and Spirit boards do the same thing and any results are questionable, at best. Not only do many involved in the paranormal consider the results dubious, it opens too wide a channel to get an accurate answer, if a genuine answer is received. The primary debate against this is the results are subject to human interference.
- The group should not jump to conclusions. At all. You may encounter something you believe is sinister, but the members should try to provide reasonable explanations as a possibility.
- Paranormal investigators should regard there work as scientific. It should be treated with due respect.
Other general rules are as follows:
- Obeys all federal, state, and municipal laws.
- Places the well-being of the client and his or her family above all other priorities.
- Describes in advance to the client (or, in the case of investigations of public venues, the designated contact person) the duration and nature of the investigation, the number and training of investigators who will be present, the nature of data to be collected, and all other considerations that might reasonably be expected to influence the client’s decision to proceed with the investigation.
- Assures that an investigation does not in any way damage any property of the client, other persons unrelated to the investigation, or any private or public business, organization, or concern.
- Assures that an investigation does not violate the rights, privacy, or well-being of persons who are not involved in the investigation (such as neighbors, bystanders, and other people in close proximity to an investigation).
- Does not discuss preliminary interpretations or conclusions with a client during an investigation. All data should be analyzed before any conclusions are shared.
- Maintains professional composure during an investigation by avoiding expressions of fear and other strong emotions (such as running away from or overreacting to paranormal activity).
- Refrains from using provocation to elicit paranormal activity except in extreme and unusual circumstances and with prior consent of the client.
- Discusses all relevant objective data (EVP, EMF, photographic evidence, thermal imaging, personal experiences, etc.) with the client. Typically, evidence is shared both through a face-to-face interaction and via a written report.
- Refrains from sharing conclusions with the client regarding the identity, nature, motivations, and potential danger of detected activity unless there is a strong evidential basis for such conclusions. In all instances, objective data must be clearly distinguished from interpretations of those data.
- Shares evidence with other certified paranormal investigators for purposes of re-reanalysis. Such evidence must be “de-identified” with respect to the identity of the client and location of the activity unless the client agrees in advance to being identified. Investigators who obtain data for secondary analysis must not share it with others in any form without the written consent of the client and the primary investigator.
- Does not publish or release data from an investigation to the public without signed consent by the client. Data collected in investigations of public venues generally do not need consent.
- Does not sponsor “ghost hunting” excursions for the public that play upon sensationalism or fear. “Ghost hunting” excursions for the public that focus upon history, local stories, and the acquisition of knowledge about the paranormal are acceptable.
- Accurately represents the knowledge and expertise of him- or herself and all members of the investigation team at all times.
Kudos to the Paranormal Resource Alliance for publishing a professional set of criteria.
Loverly,
Very well done! Although alleged hauntings should be treated with skepticism AND an open mind while being approached scientifically, they should also be looked upon with seriousness and not humor or commercial intent. Gaining knowledge in this area is of utmost importance for everyone.
Again, thanks for sharing.
R1
Thank you, R1! I would love to see a formal entity actually create a standard code of ethics or methodology for the paranormal field.
Loverly,
That sounds like it should be a priority for both the paranormal field AND the field of science. Perhaps that is one reason that there are conflicts and incongruities. Don’t you agree?
By the way, are there ever paranormal conventions where issues such as this are discussed?
R1
Hi!
Yes, it should be, I’m sure they could include the paranormal field, science and even consumer advocate groups. I believe it is much like psychology. It took centuries for that to develop into a respected science, and for decades it also went through a great deal of public ridicule and “hack” sciences.
You know, of all the paranormal conventions I’ve heard of, things like this aren’t discussed. The only ones I’ve encountered have been to display things like the latest technology or just provide a networking event for investigators. Maybe there will be one in the future.
Unfortunately, many still mock it today and consider it a pseudoscience not to be taken seriously. If you look at the Paranormal wiki-page, you will notice that it isn’t yet categorized as an actual respectable science. On the other hand, from what I remember from looking over that page, neither was psychology. Perhaps I am wrong about the latter. I’d have to take another look and see.
Networking is important, but coming into consensus on perspective and approach will unify the paranormal community and lead the field into serious light for more people, so I agree with you on that.
R1
I’m sure they do. Despite attempts to grow in the scientific community, many minds simply do not.
I wouldn’t be surprised if psychology isn’t yet deemed a science. It only gained professional respect in the past few decades and still, some people believe it’s meaningless. But, tell that to a patient!
Well, psychology is actually a science. The thing is that many people simply don’t believe in it, just as is the case with the paranormal. I just think it’s interesting that, after all the strides and accomplishments made in both psychology and psychiatry, the wiki-page still collectively categorizes these fields as a pseudoscience.
However, recent and current trends are on the verge of threatening the light of respectability applied to both psychology and psychiatry. A small sub-group overseeing the Sexual Disorders section of the DSM-5 have submitted some proposals that, if accepted for entry, will leave these field a mockery, professionally speaking. Here, take a look:
link #1
link #2
link #3
link #4
link #5
link #6
link #7
link #8
Yes, these are primary to one blog, but remember: (1) this PhD is prominent in the field, and (2) her blog features links to other related sites and blogs for additional information on the myriad of subjects involved.
By the way, I wasn’t certain whether or not your blog fosters HTML input, so I hope these links turn out right. If not, perhaps you can correct any errors. My apologies.
In any case, as you and others can see, social, political and law enforcement pressures have asserted influence for the sake interested unscientific and unrelated to science. This will not bode well for the respectability of the field of psychology as a viable field of science.
What are your thoughts on this? (sorry, I don’t mean to digress; simply elaborating on the notion and the question of psychology’s viability as a science, the same as the paranormal, so I thought it would offer some relevant insight into the discussion)
Take care
R1
Hi! Don’t apologize, I don’t mind a bit.
I do indeed think psychology is an important science, as well as psychiatry. There was a time when study of germs and bacteria was labeled, “quack,” science. I would hope our scientists would be a little more intellectually open to psychology and parapsychology, as they aren’t currently quantifiable due to a lack of research and study (and often respect). So long as we have diseases and disorders of the mind, we’ll need doctors to diagnose and treat them. Medical doctors and specialists aren’t trained for it, so that leaves a desperate need for those suffering.
I do not place a great deal of faith in current science in that regard. We should always pursue what is scientific, which includes all areas and aspects of life. I think it should be done with an open mind because the human race is still a bit primitive. It hasn’t been so long since music and energy waves would’ve also been considered “quackery,” simply because the tools didn’t yet exist to measure them by. In the early, 1970s Asbestos was perfectly safe. In the 1950s, DDTs were and LSD was an ideal anesthesia. Going back 100 years, cocaine was an ingredient in health drinks. I don’t say that to degrade science, but simply to point out that we have a long, long way to go before we can even entertain having a closed mind. The human race is still so young.
I think that’s probably been the death knell for many great ideas through time, simply because the technology didn’t exist to properly calculate, measure and classify.
Yes, it is an ongoing progression; we can’t reach our desired goals overnight, but ever contribution helps. Science helps keep the world and its people objective and real. People are quite often swayed too much by personal belief (e.g. as is the case with the subject of the links I provided, what some see as “disorders of the mind,” science doesn’t, and that creates conflict), and where I see individual thoughts and beliefs essential to the development of humanity and its world, a balance and open-mind are necessary and crucial.
Another problem is that, as you’ve said, some who aren’t trained in a particular area tend to assert themselves as authorities, perhaps due to lack of research, but also due to the convictions of one’s personal beliefs as a form of authority.
As far as the paranormal goes, what other directions should be followed to move the field toward actual scientific respectability? Perhaps (as has already been ascertained) something similar to that of psychology/psychiatry.
By the way, I am curious as to your thoughts on the links I provided above. You offered general commentary on science, but nothing specific pertaining to those issues as related to the growing respectability of psychology and psychiatry (I know, this isn’t necessarily relevant to the discussion at-hand, but I am/was curious just the same). Some of it is extremely controversial and are even very much sensitive issues for some, so I am treading lightly and with care.
If you wish, please feel free to send me an email. We can continue this discussion there. I look forward to it.
R1
Hi!
Sorry it has taken me so long to get back. My web site’s host was hacked over the weekend and I’ve been busy checking everything out.
I checked out several of the articles. I am always amazed at the “hair splitting,” when it comes to psychology. We have a variety of physical ailments in our world that does not make the individual “abnormal.” People have chemical imbalances, migraines, muscle pain, back pain (that often defies x-rays or visual evidences), tendonitis, COPD, and a host of other issues that are not traditionally quantifiable. I’ve never understood why psychology is supposed to be so different. I feel like it’s just something that happens, a diabetic doesn’t ask for their disease, a victim of depression doesn’t ask for it, what more is there to analyze?
I do think some of that material is questionable, as in regular medicine. I’m sure that shyness is “normal,” but so are a host of other conditions that simply require treatment to either improve or eliminate. I do think we live in a world that encourages sexual attraction to minors, which is not to excuse or justify that sort of atrocious behavior in any way, but merely to state why I, personally, believe it’s as commonplace as it is. The majority of our “sex symbols,” are indeed women who are built like children. Look at the majority of super models today, as compared to those of the early 1960s or 1950s. Marilyn Monroe? Ava Gardner? Those were women, built like women are supposed to be and the issue of pedophilia was rare during those times. The same with men, today, men are supposed to be lean and clean (shaved) as opposed to normal. Perhaps it is coincidence, but forcing a population to believe the physically abnormal is not only attractive, but desired, has not done our society any favors. How many eating disorders have came about due to that unreality? In both genders. How much steroid use in young boys has came because of those false and unrealistic visuals? People butcher their bodies daily to pursue what, in reality, is an abnormal physical state.
I often don’t comment on such subjects personally because I’m not an expert…lol. I have strong feelings about those topics, but are often not very popular. So, I tend to keep them to myself. I struggled with depression and anxiety both during childhood, so I recall what the experience is like. I believe people who suffer mentally deserve the same respect and accommodation as those afflicted with physical ailments.
Loverly,
For some reason, my post didn’t go through yesterday, so I’m posting it again, just in case it was lost. Sorry. if there are two of them.
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My apologies for not getting back to this sooner, but personal issues and the holiday required my immediate attention (by the way, I hope you had a please holiday).
When it comes to the term “abnormal,” what does that really mean? Is there a set of acceptable and known criteria that describes what that is? Each person is different, and because of that, each situation is different. That’s what mental abnormalities are sometimes difficult to discern.
That’s especially the case with, for example, pedophilia and even “hebephilia,” the latter of which is an obscure term not found in any psychological-oriented documentation or publication until recent years. Pedophilia is not easy to
diagnose because the onset of puberty is different with each youngster and the scientific basis is shaky, according to experts. As we know, pedophilia is the condition whereby an adult exhibits an ongoing sexual attraction to prepubescent
children (exclusive of adolescents, despite what many people think). This is because sexual arousal by an non-sexual being like a prepubescent child is considered not to be socio-biologically functional and therefore unnatural, where attraction to sexually developing teens (hebephilia and ephebophilia) is
quite common and considered normal (90% of all men are attracted to adolescents) because men are “hard-wired” by nature to be drawn to young fertile females. The only reason that this term, or “condition,” (i.e. “hebephilia”) is being proposed for inclusion in the DSM-5 is because of pressure from law enforcement and law, not because of advancements in science, which recognizes evolutionary patterns, such as natural sexual inclinations. I say this because your use of
the term “pedophilia” seemed to be correlated with your earlier reference “attraction to minors,” which is not the same thing as prepubescent children because the term “minors” is a legal concept encapsulating both prepubescent children and adolescents, not a scientific one.
I am curious for clarification on your use of the term “pedophilia,” which is why I delineated the above distinctions.
All of this summarizes some of the points shared at the links I have provided above. Just because an act or ongoing practice is considered criminal (law) doesn’t mean it is also pathological (science/nature), and vice verse. Rape and even murder are crimes, but they do not indicate any mental aberration.
By the way, please let it be known that I do not agree with child molestation. That is indeed heinous and requires legal action, so I do wholeheartedly agree with you there.
As for your statement regarding women who look like children, this, too, is vague to the point of generating confusion. In what sense do you mean when you refer to the term “children”? Biologically, youngsters are no longer children when they pass through puberty, which, on average, occurs between ages 11 and 13 (statistically, however, age 13.1 serves as the average mean, especially since 13 is the earliest age of tanner stage 4, which covers the more sexually mature youth). When you say “women who look like children,” lets hope you don’t mean
prepubescent. I have not seen many of them, if any at all. Please remember, too, that the notion of adolescents as “children” is, again, a legal distinction, not a scientific or evolutionary one because said adolescents exhibit physical
characteristics of sexual maturation (unlike prepubescent children), which is why young people in this stage of development are common and popular in many forms of modern media. Again, I ask for clarification on what you meant by “women who look like children.” We were talking about science, not law, so that is why I was a bit confused.
I realize that topics such as this are controversial and have known to be sensitive to some, which is why I proceed with care when discussing them. Please know that I never mean to be offensive to anyone and I respect each person’s perspective. Thank you for telling me you have strong feelings regarding some aspect of this, as it is important to know. I’m not sure what specifically or why, but I will be careful. Would you clarify for me what is it that creates such strong feelings? I’d be interested in knowing, although I understand if it’s too personal. Again, feel free to take it to email.
Again, sorry for digressing. I am talking about science and scientific assessment, which is why I elaborate on this, so I didn’t feel it was out of the nature of the realm of what the post. Still, we are talking about the paranormal and its scientific points, so I will leave this discussion where it is.
Take care and talk soon.
R1
Hi, R1!
Sorry, I have comments set to moderated (have to due to spam), so it went through fine. I just haven’t been able to swing by until now.
Personally, I think “normal” is a setting on an appliance and has no real influence on people. Everyone is different and everyone has different quirks and habits, I think we’re meant to be individuals.
I suppose my definitions are fairly straightforward. By minors, I mean “tweens” or younger, below 12. I’m not talking teenagers, but children. Likewise, there is a distinct and great difference between a say a 19 and a 17 year old having a relationship and actual pedophilia. I have strong feelings because I am a parent and I have known many victims of predators. I have been sexually assaulted myself, although was around 20. It isn’t really a great stretch to consider how early children are subjected to sexuality, I mean there are bathing suits for little girls, 6 or 8, with push-up bras. Children should have the ability to be children in every way.
As a woman, it’s easy to see we live in a world that fights to devalue women. The majority of women’s magazines demand you change this or that to be of any worth. Admittedly, that ultimately falls to women’s choice, but it does make you wonder why such change is necessary to begin with.
By women “looking like children,” I mean simply that. Taller versions of what girls commonly look like at 12. Many modern models fall in that category. Of course, some people are naturally built like that, I’m not saying anything of them. Too many women are encouraged to emaciate their bodies and if they can’t do it by starving their bodies (which leads to eating disorders) they then go to cosmetic procedures to have it removed surgically. It’s unhealthy in itself. Again, it’s free choice and people can do what they wish, but to hinge self-value and self-worth on physical appearance is just sad. And society teaches it to our children daily. I’ve known people with eating disorders, too.
I can do some rambling myself…lol. Thanks for posting.
Laura,
I can relate to much of what you’re saying here. First, sexual assault is unacceptable regardless of age, although it is even more heinous, appalling and damaging when the victim is under the age of 12, or prepubescent, because the child is not primed for sexual intercourse and is incapable of dealing with such an offense. That’s not to minimize sexual assault on older individuals such as yourself, however, I am only establishing a distinction here, and it appears as if you have already made it.
That leads into the issue regarding the sexualization of kids before they are ready. bikinis for 6-year-olds is putting the cart before the horse (6-year-olds, or any other prepubescent females, have no breasts, so why the need for the top? Style? Fashion?). Society places the marker of ‘sex object’ on the female, right or wrong, and attempts to socialize female children in this regard right from the beginning. This shows just how adamantly persistent socialization is. The media facilitates it and people are subject to those influences.
By the way, I have been assaulted as well, so I sympathize. Such an experience is not easy to live with and it does leave a lasting impression.
As for the value of appearance, that is all a part of the socialization process as well. Females are made to believe that appearance is important, and in world societies, it IS. I am not defending, only stating a fact. There is a point of going overboard, though, as sexualizing and ‘prettying up’ the appearance of young children (i.e. prepubescents) is a sign of that. Women of all ages are made to feel that appearance is crucial to success because society facilitates it. Health seems to be ignored because social forces are so insistent. This denotes an ongoing conflict and struggle between science, nature and social design. Which one will win in the end, if only one can reign?
This gets back to the paranormal and why it is strives for acceptance and respectability in the science world. Personal beliefs quite often conflict with scientific evaluation. That doesn’t mean that the paranormal lacks credence as far as reality goes, only that personal beliefs tend to carry more weight than scientific evaluation or evidence. That’s why I said before that if the paranormal is to be taken seriously as a field of science, it must adhere to scientific principles more than it has in recent years. It’s nice that scientists are becoming more involved and applying said principles and methodology to paranormal studies. This way, we will be able to understand and approach the phenomena much better and more unbiasedly, and the studies will eventually bring forth more conclusive answers to the ongoing queries and mysteries involved in the field.
R1
Hi!
I’m sorry to hear it happened to you, too. It is awful, but even as bad as it was, I can’t imagine such a trauma to a child. It’s beyond me, I guess.
Women are ingrained to value their appearance, I think in many regards, funny as it may sound, men look at women the way we look at jewelry. I’m not saying women shouldn’t value their appearance. I think it’s important that women feel good and often that entails feeling like you look good. But, so often, that’s all you hear about. Doesn’t matter if you’re promoted at your job, doesn’t matter if you get your degree or even a doctorate, doesn’t matter if you have the cooking skills that would shame any chef. It’s all about physical appearance. I would love to see concerns over good health trump that of simple appearance.
I think, for many skeptics today, no amount of proof will ever sway them. The paranormal group I’m in uses a quote, “For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don’t believe, no proof is possible. — Stuart Chase.” I think that says it all because nothing will ever convince them. But, none of this stops with us. I think if proper foundations are in place, future generations will accept it as just another area of science. I often think today’s paranormal is like the music of yesterday. People had no idea how to measure sound waves, had no idea even of what they were. But, eventually the technology came about to measure, record and study what made sound.
Loverly,
As much as I hate to say it, people believe what they believe and that’s it. This is why I sometimes wonder about the significance and relevance of evidence, because, in the end, does it really matter? Evidence is important to me, but so is faith and keeping and open mind. My personal experiences have shown me things I cannot ignore, but I also realize that an objective approach is also essential.
Yes, it’s important to lay the foundations and keep a focus on that. The tides of time are constantly flowing. Eventually changes will come about. Patience is a virtue.
As for appearance-over-all, humans have always been that way. It’s a shame that a set of breasts would outweigh a PhD as far as men go, or that muscles catch a woman’s eye before his mind. Both appearance and mind should be balanced–the Asians teach this. People are quite influenced by commercialism, but until business recognizes this balance and promotes it, nothing will change. I dare say that won’t happen for some time to come. “Sex sells,” as the saying goes, and that’s why business promotes it in everything it does because it brings about a profit. This is why the value of appearance has been ingrained into our culture and, in turn, into our subconscious–that at the importance of the almighty dollar.
By the way, are you on Facebook?
I tend to follow Thomas Edison’s example when it comes to failure, be it in writing or the paranormal. He had 999 failures before he had a success. So, he was either the most determined individual in recent history or mad…lol. Either way, if it hadn’t been for whatever he had, we might not have electricity as we do. So, it was a good thing. Perhaps we’ll see much failure and disappointment, but one day, at some point, something is going to bridge the gap between science and the paranormal.
I have a great respect for Asian culture, particularly their horror movies. There are some that’ve been Westernized and I don’t care for those at all, but the ones that really show their culture and all the good things, I love. They still value what many in the West seem to’ve lost long ago, esp. in Japanese culture.
You’re probably right in regards to sex sells. Shame that it is so used, but it is. I mean, of course that are appropriate uses in some instances such as apparel or touristy things like beaches perhaps, but it’s used for everything.
Yes, I am on Facebook. This blog should be connected to it. If not, I think my screen nic is “wicked ambition.” Yes, it is: http://www.facebook.com/wickedambition
I love Asian cultures as well. There is something ancient and mystical about them that make them so alluring. I would love to visit the orient some day to experience that culture first-hand. I can’t do that here because everything foreign has become Americanized, which goes without saying. That’s why I appreciate movies and literature that reflect those cultures and not tainted by outside influences. You learn a lot about other cultures that way.
As for sex, it is a natural part of our being, our existence, so it isn’t really a surprise that people are drawn to it. After all, the sex drive, it is said, is the strongest human inclination. Still, there is a point of what is appropriate and inappropriate, such as sexualizing little children. Is that a cultural distinction, though? Perspectives and attitudes on sexual practices and proclivities differ around the world. The one constant is that sex is popular everywhere.
Thanks for your FB link. I will look you up . . .
R1
Hi!
I’d always had a slight affinity for Asia, ever since I was little. I’m not sure where that came from, but have many, many things like that. Sort of like something you’re just born with.
Anyways, the movie “The Ring,” really pushed me towards it. I loved it. I love their horror, unless it’s Westernized, it’s respectable. Brings to mind Shirley Jackson or Algernon Blackwood when it was okay for horror writers to be fairly intelligent and intellectual. Sort of like the industry pre-“good ol’ boy,” horror. King was indeed an innovator, but he really did a number on the perception of horror. Today, we have to have a separate genre for “literary horror” and I think it would be more appropriate to have standard horror and then, “good ol’ boy” horror, because the genre was very intelligent just a few decades ago. Koji Suzuki wrote the book, “The Ring,” and I read it. Was hooked after that. I held the same affinity for”The Grudge.” I started collecting obscure Asian horror titles afterward.
Thankfully, Europe seems to be catching on, esp. Spain, I’ve seen several good ones both from there and the UK. Turkey is catching up, but still has a little ways. Lol. I sound like the news reader with “Horror Around the World.”
Anyway, actually I don’t see anything at all wrong with greatly enjoying sex. It’s amazing in a healthy relationship. But, the majority of people don’t seem to have healthy relationships and I think that’s where it starts getting really cloudy. When it gets cloudy, things start going wrong or from bad to worse.
I saw “The Ring,” too and was riveted. I haven’t seen “The Ring II” but I would like to. This suspense was unique, unlike the typical cheap thrills provided by westernized efforts. There’s something to say about uniqueness–it stands out. That’s why I prefer it. Films from other cultures tend to be this way, and so I am drawn to them for that reason.
As for healthy relationships, how does a person develop one? Obviously the answer to that question is beyond most people if the majority land in unhealthy relationships. The sex would be better in healthy relationships. But does the healthy relationship lead to enjoyable sex or does enjoyable sex lead to a healthy relationship? Many people tend to be drawn to abusive relationships simply because the sex is great. Still, those who enjoy sex with each other tend to lead into a workable relationship. I guess it depends on the individuals involved and the particular set of circumstances of their situation.
They’re all pretty good, but I’m partial to the first. I guess it’s just that initial shock. It’s like “Paranormal Activity.” I loved the first, the second was good, too, but you sort of knew what to expect. If you can watch with subtitles, several other good Japanese horror movies are, “Red Shoes,” “Premonition,” and one I fell in love with last year, although I believe it’s Korean, “Aarang.”
I haven’t seen “Paranormal Activity” yet either, but I want to and I look forward to. I have a Paranormal film sub-collection that IN am developing, and both of those just might fit nicely. For me, though, the story must be realistic, not blood and gore like “The Night of the Living Dead” or “Halloween” or “Elm Street” (I’m not saying these aren’t good movies, only that they not reflective of actual paranormal, like apparitions, white noise, flickering shadows, footsteps, and poltergeist activity). I like “Stir of Echoes” for that reason, although the rape/murder sub-plot that explained the girl’s death tends to be a typical suspense development.
As for subtitles, I don’t mind. As a matter of fact, I sometimes prefer them, as long as they don’t fly by too fast for me to read.
Thanks for the tips. I have heard of “Premonition,” and I think I have heard of “Aarang,” but I haven’t seen those either. I can do a search at Half.ebay.
I loved Paranormal Activity. They only had a budget of around $12K to do the whole thing. I thought it was brilliant. I do not like blood and gore. I know that’s thrown into the horror area, but the majority of it simply is not horror. The majority of hardcore detective/police fiction is filled with gore so, automatically, it can’t be used to determine a genre. Now, the first SAW is an exception to me. It was very gory, but the suspense was so powerful you don’t really pay attention to it. The sequels haven’t had it because they concentrated way too much on gore and not story. You can tell. Technically, the movie 28 Days and the franchise would be science fiction. It revolves around a non-existent disease, nothing supernatural or even zombie-relevant. They just go mad, they don’t become the living dead. But, it’s always classified as horror. I like the mind-bender horror, too. I adored Frailty, but I know it got terrible reviews. Sometimes I think a lot of “horror” review sites are biased against actual horror and prefer the “fluff” of horror and gratuity.
I didn’t see your question on relationships earlier, my WordPress cut it off. As far as healthy relationships, I think that starts with friendship. In truth, I think any abusive relationship is still abusive, regardless, and would have a strong negative impact on any physical enjoyment. You couldn’t really feel any intimacy or closeness with someone who was abusive, you may tell yourself you do, but that would be missing.
That is the first sign of trouble in a normal relationship, if you have a good one. Usually, especially in marriages, when the couple are together less and less, that indicates there’s a serious issue somewhere. On that same note, sometimes I think people put too much pressure on one another after a while in a relationship. Many times, you hear people talk about sex growing “stale,” but that is often used when someone in the relationship has issues elsewhere. It sort of becomes a “grass is greener,” complex where they believe if they could just be in this relationship or that relationship, things would be better. Then, they do start anew with someone else, but the same problem keeps popping up. They never think it’s something inside them, but something always wrong with the other person and they move on to someone else. I think that’s why so many today will go through 3 or 4 marriages and still feel they need something new. They aren’t looking at the real problem, which is them and they’re casually messing the lives of numerous others up in the process.
I’m on Netflix, they have a good selection of foreign titles.
I cannot help but wonder why so many movies are misclassified. Does it have something to do with public perception or merely the perception of the entity providing the classification?
As for abusiveness, I agree, but I have known women who returned to their abusers because (1) the sex was great, (2) they had a closeness with their abusers due to a shared history or “so many good times,” or, simply, (3) “because I love him,.” This reflects poor self-esteem, true, but apparently these women seemed to believe in their rationale for going back into the clutches of an abuser. You cannot reason with them.
Sex isn’t the all and the end, but younger people seem to insist as if this were the case, then when they get into a relationship with someone who is great in bed but a mismatch in every other way, they are baffled. The relationship turns sour, and because of their shared “closeness” over time , their dependency on one another or because “the sex is great,” they are drawn back into an unhealthy relation and unable to break free.or see the issue as no major or serious thing. Is this due to a misinterpretation of circumstances or merely personal preference? hmmm.
R1
I think younger people confuse sex with love and acceptance. Which are two different things. And, the fact is that people who are “bad” in bed are often eager to learn otherwise. Learning takes 2 people and it takes time. I think sex is perceived as a static function, but it isn’t. You grow and develop and mature, I think your capacity in that respect does, too. Sort of like people cheat themselves out of what could be a magnificent relationship, because of poor performance once or twice and never stop to think that it can be corrected, like any other talent or skill in life. No writers are born “bestsellers” without some training, no doctors are born skilled surgeons without training, that’s not really any different.
It’s very sad.
I think there’s a lot of bribery that goes on in the movie industry. There are a number of horror sites, that I know of, that give glowing reviews for free stuff. So if the movie company sends them some free DVDs or essentially “butters them up,” they’ll rave about the poorest quality movies. I hit a review I nearly fell over laughing about. I think it was Fangoria, the horror magazine, reviewed the movie Devil. Which I liked it. They HATED it with a passion because it had dogma. A movie named Devil containing some sort of dogma should be expected. I couldn’t believe they actually published that.
Loverly,
What should people expect from a movie entitled Devil? Did they expect it to be merely scares and freaks and, perhaps, blood and gore? If this is the case, I can understand why horror mags might not favor the inclusion of dogma. Others might be skittish when it comes to content that includes anything religious. Imagine the potential of backlash of any sort. In light of this, they have to cut the movie down a few marks.
Still, have people, even those who are professionals, fallen to a level shallowness nepotism? Politics is a practice that exists everywhere–apparently with regards to expressing one’s personal perspective.
As for what you said regarding the distinction between sex and love/acceptance, I am in total agreement. Still, for younger people, sex seems to weigh heavier, or at least is more influential. They tend to target great sex first and then extrapolate love from that, or seek it out. When it comes to the younger generation potential mates are measured and judged based on physical appearance and sexual prowess, so, yes, I see exactly what you’re saying there. If a man isn’t ‘big enough” or doesn’t “measure up” in bed, he’s a loser and should be cast aside for someone “better.” The young men behave the same way toward ladies as well. They lack the insight and patience regarding what you have said, that sexual skill can be enhanced with practice and experience and, yes, patience and guidance. This comes about, though, when love is already in place between two people. This might be one reason why so many young relationships fail–because they go for the sex first.
R1
I know. It would be like getting mad because Clash of the Titans involved Greek mythology. I think it’s kind of spooky that society does seem to fear religion in the numbers they do. I am not a Buddhist or a Hindu, but I watch many films which have heavily religious themes, and I don’t see anything offensive with it at all. Everyone is different, faith-wise as well, and I think it’s wonderful when people can view other faiths with respect and embrace a desire to peacefully coexist. Not obliterate it from existence because you don’t agree with it. I don’t see how any individual in horror, in any way, could be offended because the original horror was very much supernatural and good vs. evil by way of demons and devils. I think nepotism is everywhere.
In truth, I think many of the issues of “measuring up,” stems from women, as our bodies aren’t meant to continually have new mates and the process of frequently having different ones does things to the body, in particular the female body. That elasticity is only good for so long. After that, it’s gone, just like with skin’s elasticity. But, society encourages it and it will be an issue so long as its so promoted. I can’t count the friends I had who really did abuse their bodies in awful ways and today, they’ll tell you openly about what problems it creates. But, peers pressured them, its what they saw here and there, and kids are sensitive to things like that. It’s pitiful.